Finally, White Hall!

The reception hall at White Hall

Dear Engaged Couples-

Table setting for wedding reception--White Hall

     After my daughter’s boyfriend proposed a few years ago, she and I began making the rounds of local vineyards ( a difficult, dreary task, I know!) to find the right place at the right price for her and Adam’s wedding reception.  All the vineyards we visited had scenic views to die for, happy to say.  But we had other criteria.  We were looking for a vineyard that was not too very distant from the church at which they would be saying their vows; that church was in Covesville, Virginia, that is, South of Charlotteville.  Pippin Hill hadn’t been established yet, or that would definitely have been in the running.  We also decided, somewhat late in the game, that we did not want to use onsite catering services.  We crossed Veritas and King Family off our list even though we admitted they were fabulous venues.   After much deliberation we decided on White Hall Vineyard, a picturesque site off Barracks Road, appropriately enough, in the town of White Hall. Yes, it is a good 30 minute trip from Covesville to White Hall, but besides the fact that White Hall allowed us to bring our own caterers, we liked its intimacy.  The whole thing –tasting room and banquet hall is contained in one, very nicely decorated building. We also appreciated the fact that the staff was gracious and extremely solicitous.  Phone calls were returned, e-mails answered in a timely fashion.  I have such fond memories of the place, that my wine supplier of choice now is White Hall.  I try to keep a case of White Hall wine in my basement at all times, to give as gifts, or to serve in my home for special occasions.  My favorite White Hall wine, by the way is Gewürztraminer.  And yes, I even know how to pronounce it! 

The happily married couple, with family

 This past weekend I had the opportunity to officiate at a wedding at White Hall—FINALLY.  It was as I remembered.  Beautifully decorated.  Wonderfully landscaped.   Solicitous staff, and great wine.   I have included some pics from last week’s function. 

If you are interested in visiting, or doing a tasting, the address is WHITE HALL VINEYARDS; 5282 Sugar Ridge Road; Crozet, Virginia 22932.  White Hall’s tasting room is open 11-5 Wednesday through Sunday.  

The Wedding Line Up

Me before a wedding at the International School--
near Richmond.  Note empty row of chairs in front.
These are reserved for close family members

Dear Engaged Couple—

Today I want to talk about lineups—lineups of family members.   It can all seem so very formal—and tedious too, to have to plan who comes in to the wedding when.  But if you want your service to look nice and tidy, and well thought through, then you will want to spend some time making a list.  Actually, if you choose me as your officiant, I will make a list for you.

Oh, those dastardly but necessary lists!

  Hopefully, you will have reserved the first (and maybe second) row of chairs just for your close family members.  They are your loved ones, after all, and they deserve front-row seats for this, your very important moment.  Imagine that your guests are all seated, waiting for the service to begin.  If you have music playing (and most weddings do include music), the music may (or may not) change when your close family members enter.  You will want to talk with your musician(s) and/or dj about this.  I warn you, the more changes in music, the more cues that have to be given, the more complicated the service.   

Ok.  For the list:  Among “close family members” please include your grandparents.  You can include other people, too, (the favorite aunt who helped raise you?  The uncle who paid for your college tuition?;  but your grandparents will expect to be included among your close family members.  The groom’s grandparents come in first, then the bride’s.  If some of your grandparents are deceased, the ones still living will need escorts.  Does granddad have a granddaughter who could accompany him down the aisle?  A daughter?  A good friend?  Work this out BEFORE the rehearsal.  Practice, AT the rehearsal.

 Next come the groom’s parents, and then the bride’s mother.  I say bride’s mom, because usually the bride’s dad escorts the bride down the aisle (although sometimes it’s the mother, sometimes it’s the mother and father together, and sometimes the bride walks down the aisle by herself).  If dad is walking you down the aisle, then he won’t be available to accompany his wife (your mother).   So, your mother will need an escort.  This could be a brother, or an uncle, a close friend.  I think it is very touching when the groom escorts his soon-to-be-mother-in-law down the aisle, seats her and then gives her a quick kiss on the cheek.  However, this can feel a little weird, if you (the groom), and your future mother-in-law don’t get along very well.  If it feels the least bit uncomfortable,  don’t do it!

Family members of groom waiting for the rehearsal to begin.
Keswick Vineyard outside Charlottesville

Now it often happens that some of the parents/grandparents in the wedding are divorced.  The bride and groom may not want to have steps or girlfriends/boyfriends in the wedding party.  I encourage the couples I marry who are in this situation to err on the side of generosity and inclusivity, if at all possible.   It’s a good way to start out a marriage. 

If the bride and groom are planning an elaborate church wedding, with utmost decorum, they may want ALL their female family members to be escorted in.  So, for instance, instead of the groom’s mother and father walking in together, the groom’s mother will be escorted by a groomsman and the father of the groom will follow behind.  I have only officiated at a couple of weddings where this degree of etiquette is followed, but, my goodness,  I’m sure that Emily Post was smiling in  heaven!  

That's it for today.  Happy wedding planning!  Your Wedding Preacher

Bride, groom and groom's parents
at Barboursville Vineyard

Oh, those Boutonnieres and Corsages! What to do?

House Mountain Inn, Lexington, VA

Interior, House Mountain Inn--the Great Room

Dear Engaged Couple-

    I was officiating at a wedding last weekend at a gorgeous venue just outside Lexington, Virginia.   The wedding was at a mountain lodge with a breathtaking view of the mountains and with a wonderful inside-mountain escape setting, too—we’re talking big fireplace, a tastefully decorated great room for entertaining….but I’ve just begun this blog and already I digress.  Forgive me.

Note:  The boutonniere is slightly below
the widest part of the lapel

    What I wanted to discuss today was boutonnieres and corsages.  The wedding at the lodge was just about to get underway.  The guests were all seated, and close family members and the wedding party were lining up for their entry.  An aunt of the bride walked among us pinning on the requisite flowers.  She obviously knew what she was doing, but as an onlooker to the proceedings, I wondered if most people actually DO know the correct way to pin.  Just so you know, the pinning, or magneting (I will get to this in a minute) went off without a hitch—as did the wedding proper.   

So here is the skinny about flowers.   First, I will tackle the pinning of the boutonniere (which is French for button hole).  It is pinned to a man’s lapel, with a pearl-topped pin provided by the florist.  It goes on the man’s LEFT lapel.  Although the pin is pretty, the pearl part is actually hidden.  Whoever is doing the pinning (and I would suggest that the one wearing the boutonniere NOT try to do this himself), starts the pin from underneath the lapel.  The boutonniere is attached just slightly below the widest part of the lapel.  When the pin’s point reaches the top part of the lapel, try to catch the green florist tape.  It makes the thing that much more secure.  Then draw the pin back into the fabric, making sure that the pin is at a slight angle—that, so that the wearer won’t get stabbed in the chest when he moves his arm.

This corsage might best be worn on the wrist

The same location, the same process goes for the woman’s corsage, IF the fabric the woman is wearing is sturdy enough to support a corsage, that is.  The wise bride will ask the women in the wedding party, and her close women family members, what they will be wearing before she actually orders the flowers.  Don’t risk pinning a corsage to a silk dress, or blouse for obvious reasons.   If a regular corsage won’t work—order wrist corsages for these women—these go on the woman’ left wrist and are easily secured with elastic provided by the florist.  The other option is to use magnets.  The florist hides a small magnet in the corsage.  Then, instead of pinning the corsage to the dress, place another magnet (again, provided by the florist) which looks like a metal pill, inside  the dress or blouse where you want the corsage to go.   Voila!

I know, I know this is such a small thing, really, when you have so much else to worry about regarding your big day.  But, in weddings, as in life, the little things can become the big things.  Take all this to heart now, and then you’ll have one less thing to worry about the day of.   Happy Wedding planning!  

Your wedding Preacher for Hire

  

   

     

Posing for camera at House Mountain Inn after wedding

Ever Think of having your Wedding in France? Read on!

Strolling along the Champs Elysee window shopping

Dear engaged couple—It’s been a few week.  I have been off in Paris, and touring Normandy, too.  What fun!  So today I thought I would let you in on some of what I learned about wedding opportunities while I was away, and also give you a glimpse of my travels.  Here goes!

Want to have THE ring of a life time, and then some—to be passed on to daughter to daughter or son to son for their brides.  If you have the money, why not shop for your engagement and wedding rings along the Champs Elysee in Paris?  Here are a few pics of rings I saw while window shopping.  No, I don’t know the  price of these.  I am sure they are tres cheres.  As I said, this is only IF you have the money.



If you decide to stay in Paris for your wedding proper, assuming your guests will have enough money to make the trip, or assuming you can pay for their plane fare and overnight stay, why  not try Sacre Coeur at least for your before wedding pics?  In this picture you see a couple and their photographer on the steps of this beautiful Basilica in Paris.  It is one of the must-sees of the city.  Only problem is there are A LOT of tourists there and a lot of steps to climb to get to there.  Maybe best to rent a chauffeur for trip there and back. 



This bride and groom are having
their wedding pics taken
at Sacre Coeur

Wonderful place for your wedding (see church above) and your
reception!

j

As far as places for your wedding proper, may I recommend Normandy, France.  My oh my did we see a beautiful church there.  Old, as well, the entire village in which we found it—the village of Bechet.  The picture I took says it all.  Right next to the church is a refurbished building—it looked to me like the mayor’s mansion or something—but the sign out front says that it can be rented for events—including wedding receptions.  Mon Dieu! What a great idea!  And, for you and your overnight guests and family members, may I recommend the Moulin de Bechet, which is a restored mill.  The accommodations were tremendous, the food delicieux and the staff, friendly beyond friendly. 

In closing, I thought I should share a picture with you of my traveling companions.  What fun.  Yours,

Gay Lee

Of Apples and Grapes

Wedding at Castle Hill Cidery--on the lawn

 Grapes have not always been the fruit of choice for farmers in the Charlottesville/Albemarle/Nelson County area.  Central Virginia once was and still is known as apple country.  Indeed, the Albemarle Pippin owes its name to the area in which it was so successfully grown for centuries—Albemarle County.  Today the fruit is coming back into popularity, thanks to the nation’s love of American wines.  Yes, there be apple wines in Virginia and the Albemarle Pippin makes for one of the best apple wines.

Varieties of Pippin Apple

The Albemarle Pippin actually originated in 1700 near the village of Newtown on Long Island, New York. Col. Thomas Walker of Castle Hill in Keswick, Virginia visited Newtown, and brought back with him  Albemarle Apple seedlings .  He planted these on his farm and before long he had whole orchards of Pippins.  Thomas Walker, by the way, was a friend of our own beloved Thomas Jefferson. 

The Albemarle Pippin is not very attractive, as far as apples go. It would almost be an insult for someone to say you are the Albemarle Pippin of my eye.  That is  why you won’t find it in grocery stores. It looks like a poor second cousin to a ripe Rome or Delicious.  But taste wise, it surpasses both. 

Castle Hill Cidery--great place for your
wedding and reception!

Today, Thomas Walker’s home is the site of a cidery—Castle Hill Cidery.  It is a grand place for a wedding with lots of lawns and other beautiful areas, and of course, orchards.  And an added plus is that you can offer your guests several varieties of apple wine at the reception following.  So consider historic Castle Hill Cidery as a venue for your wedding.  To arrange for a visit and talk about your wedding plans, call Castle Hill’s director of events, Evelyn Keyes.  Her contact information is  202.390.2323 or at events@castlehillcider.com.  It will be worth your time, promise.  

Do I need a blood test?

C'ville Coffee in Charlottesville--THE meeting
place for meeting couples

Dear Engaged Couples-

     In conversation with a couple this week, at C’ville Coffee (in Charlottesville)  my preferred meeting spot, office away from home, and central connection point with friends and colleagues, the bride-to-be asked if she and her fiancé would need blood tests before they marry.  It’s a good question, of course.  Blood tests used to be required  in virtually all states, but not in Virginia—at least not today, in 2013. But her question raised several other questions:  “Why were blood tests EVER required before marriage?” and "Do any states still require blood tests before marriage?"  Today, I decided to do a little investigating.  Here’s what I found out. 

Yuck!  Syphilis sores. Thank goodness
 for antibiotics!  

Once upon a time, syphilis was a dreaded sexually transmitted disease that infected the likes of Franze Schubert, Arthur Schopenhauer, and Edouard Manet. It is now thought that Christopher Columbus brought the disease back to Europe after his travels to the Americas.  Until the early 1900’s there was no cure for that disease which, when left untreated, leads to body sores, followed by loss of weight, blindness, dementia and finally, an early death. Besides the horrific effects of syphilis on adults, if left untreated in a mother, her developing fetus may also contract the disease. Today, glory be, the disease can be treated with a simple course of antibiotics.    

Whether or not a mother has ever contracted the rubella virus (measles), or has ever had the rubella vaccine, can also be detected by a blood test. If a pregnant mother has had neither the disease nor the vaccine, and then contracts rubella during pregnancy, her unborn child may suffer  serious birth defects. 

These are two good reasons, then,  that our forefathers and foremothers made blood tests a requirement for marriage. Of course, we know that many mothers today are unmarried so better to require blood tests when a mother first becomes pregnant—hence the need for good prenatal care. 

Today the one hold-out for premarital blood tests is the state of Montana.  It requires that the bride-to-be undergo a blood test IF she is under the age of 50 (in other words, of childbearing years).  

Aren’t you glad you asked?   School’s out for today.  Many, many blessings your way.  

Your Wedding Preacher

Bottom line--We need to keep her safe from diseases.

Froggy went a Courting...or was that a Young Gentleman?

Couple's lovely historic home in Charlottesville

Dear Engaged Couple-

 This week I met with a couple who will be marrying in June.   The couple is fortunate enough to have already bought a house, dating from the early 1900’s,  in a once neglected but  now up and coming neighborhood in Charlottesville.  It is gorgeous if, like me, you love houses with character.  The couple has embraced “shabby sheik” decor that still has my drooling—Painted chairs and a painted armoire, mismatched pulls on drawers, and mismatched furniture, too.  Somehow, it all fits together,  to make a delightfully fun, comfortable and aesthetically appealing whole.

  

The couples’ energy and interest in things historic and in home decorating now extends to wedding planning.   The bride and hubby-to-be have decided on a Victorian theme.  He and she will be wearing Victorian garb and they are encouraging their guests to do likewise. The evening I visited, the couple’s kitchen table was strewn with wedding trinkets—many of them antique looking—ribbons, gold tipped white silk roses,  and….a courting candle.  They plan is to weave all of these elements into the wedding service’s décor. 

A "Courting Candle"--the rim of the
candle holder is adjustable

I was drawn to the courting candle.  “What did you say that was?” I asked the bride-to-be.  Her answer:  “A courting candle.  From the 1600’s through the 1800’s, when a beau came calling, the woman’s father would light a candle in a candle holder like this one.” 

When I got home that evening I did more research.  This is what I learned..   The courting candle usually has an adjustable base.  The father adjusted the base of the candle holder to match his trust level in the daughter’s suitor.  The courting candle would rest on a table, or maybe on the fireplace mantle in the room where the “courting” was to take place.  The man and woman would “court” while ostensibly they both watched the flame’s wick move slowly but inevitably toward the candle holder’s base.  When the candle had run its course, the courting session was at an end.

The couple’s antique courting candle will be on display at their wedding,  Their particular candle holder (see below)  is inside a little cage—to prevent tampering, perhaps?  Or to prevent a quick candle exchange? We can imagine couples devising all sorts of schemes to extend their courting time.

"Courting candle in a cage"

Enjoy these pics.  BTW, you can purchase courting candles through Amazon.com or  http://www.stonecountyironworks.com/shop-products. 

Happy wedding planning!  Your Wedding Preacher for Hire